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A collaboration over too much coffee.
coffee and pen

26 October, 2004

Nineteen

At nineteen, I wasn't like this.

I didn't talk innuendo;
I didn’t know how.
and I just knew, love was waiting
for me to graduate.

At nineteen, I did not practice verbosity.

I wrote for intra-mural participation certificates.
I wrote, for they told me, I had poetry in me…
Terrible rhymes, I wrote, contorted into lameness
in the effort to rhyme.

At nineteen, I was not a funny shape.
I was not plump and thin, smooth and scarred.
I worked, resisted work,
And hid in the bathroom. Tears -
my shame and pride.

At nineteen, I had no tricky charm.
I smiled rarely, if at all.

I grasped the world, without grabbing it,
nor grappling for my two column worth in it.

At nineteen, I wasn't homeless,
nor Godless.
I knew a home and took a bus back.
Fought one God in a chapel and found another tramping in the Dargah.

At nineteen, I strained at the leash that was me.
At nineteen, I waited for life.

Written long, long ago... I wrote bad poetry, much beyond nineteen.

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8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Annie.. my feelings -


At Nineteen I just wrote poetry
Not Judging good or bad
It was a part of ME..

26 October, 2004 18:05  
Blogger incognito said...

Wow! you echo my thoughts...thanks for putting it down in such beautiful words...

27 October, 2004 09:36  
Blogger Annie Zaidi said...

thank you, thank you, thank you... [blush, blush :P ]

29 October, 2004 13:54  
Blogger manisha lakhe said...

i glad am to stand as annie z fan club president...second me, someone?

31 October, 2004 18:13  
Blogger zigzackly said...

to ML

The line forms on the right, dear.

01 November, 2004 02:15  
Blogger Unknown said...

It's not terrible but great poetry. Just the thought of you being 19 and in self-doubt it delectable enough!

01 November, 2004 11:57  
Blogger Dhruv Arora said...

Annie,

I know nothing about poetry. But, can make some sense. And, the NEGATION is wonderful way of conveying present and past past.

Can you send me the complete song "Tu Zinda hai, Tu zindagi ki ..." on dhruv.aurora@gmail.com.That would be kind.
Thanks,
Hope you read this comment.

28 January, 2005 03:00  
Blogger Innocent Bullet said...

atreyee first mentioned this poem to me... now i thank her for leading me here and you for being nineteen... :-)

22 February, 2005 23:27  

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